The Joke/Funny Pic/Video Thread

You are right, Butch :).

I know I am more easily confused than some, most especially when popular culture is part of the equation :D.
 
A cowboy, who just moved to Montana from Texas, walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud.
He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.
When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy,
"You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it.
It would taste better if you bought one at a time."
The cowboy replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers.
One is in Arizona , the other is in Colorado.
When we all left our home in Texas, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together.
So I'm drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself."
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way.
He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs.
All the regulars take notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss."
The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs.
"Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains.
"It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking."
"Hasn't affected my brothers though."
 
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In church Sunday the lady in the pew next to me was saying a prayer. It was so innocent and sincere that I just had to share it with you.

Dear Lord: The last few years have been very tough: You have taken from me my favorite actor - Paul Newman, my favorite actress - Elizabeth Taylor, my favorite singer - Andy Williams, my favorite author - Tom Clancy, and my favorite comedian - Robin Williams.

I just want you to know that my favorite politicians are Don Trump, George Bush, Mitch McConnell, Betsy DeVos, Devil Nunes, Bill Barr, Mike Pence, and Mike Pompeo
 
Just yesterday I picked up a box to put in recycle, and thought "I'll hold on to that awhile", and got another box :^D

#2 is particularly galling because I hardly *ever* throw anything out, but throwing it out is a good way of ensuring I'll soon need it.
 
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