The Official Happy Birthday thread!!!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY! MAY YOUR ENEMIES STEP BAREFOOT ON LEGOS! ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT ON THE WAY TO THE BATHROOM! MAY THIS ALSO CAUSE THEM TO STUB THEIR TOE, ON THE OPPOSITE FOOT, SPECIFICALLY THE PINKY TOE! THEN THE WILL HOP ON ONE FOOT, BACK ONTO THE LEGO! AND MAY IT BE A LITTLE SQUARE FOUR PEG LEGO, ALL ALONE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FLOOR! MAY IT ALWAYS SOMEHOW BE CORNER UP! AND MAY THEY CONTINUE TO TROD UPON IT! MAY THEY ALSO PEE THEMSELVES A LITTLE! AND THEIR SPOUSE SNICKER NOT-SO QUIETLY!
 
Crap, now I've got to come up with another one! And no B, I've never done exactly that, but it's what I envision whenever I think of stepping on Legos.

Happy Birthday Eric! May your Rivals all have naughty cats. May the cats puke in their slippers, and pee in their work shoes. May the cats also crap on the floor, precisely one groggy, grumpy step away from the soiled slippers, and may it be both warm and grainy between their toes. Let murdered mice be found upon the pillow, verily, let it be a constant occurrence, and may the responsible feline, develop a taste for disembowelment, carried out atop the pillow as well.
 
I have never done that but I have climbed all the way to my TIP and then raised my foot with ascender up like I was going to take another step and gotten double blocked with my foot uncomfortablly high and too much tension on it to release the ascender. Moments of panic before remembering I can loosen the ascender foot straps to get out. I think escaping that situation should be a drill taught to new climbers. Low and slow.
 
I've had a couple occasions where I was in an uncomfortable position, and I had to tell myself to "pay attention before you end up on the news". Nothing drastic, or scary, but it was heading in that direction if a correction wasn't made.
 
I have never done that but I have climbed all the way to my TIP and then raised my foot with ascender up like I was going to take another step and gotten double blocked with my foot uncomfortablly high and too much tension on it to release the ascender. Moments of panic before remembering I can loosen the ascender foot straps to get out. I think escaping that situation should be a drill taught to new climbers. Low and slow.
Woo boy...I am reminded by this post of a time I swung my spur-wearing right foot over a large Doug fir limb at almost hip high. Why from that position relative to the limb I don't recall, but most likely some other obstruction above. Anyway, I managed to jam my knee against the trunk of the tree and simultaneously set the spur well and truly deep in the top of the branch. No further movement possible :D.

Had to unbuckle and remove that spur to escape. What a pickle :lol:.
 
HAPPY BIRTHDAY! MAY YOUR ENEMIES STEP BAREFOOT ON LEGOS! ESPECIALLY AT NIGHT ON THE WAY TO THE BATHROOM! MAY THIS ALSO CAUSE THEM TO STUB THEIR TOE, ON THE OPPOSITE FOOT, SPECIFICALLY THE PINKY TOE! THEN THE WILL HOP ON ONE FOOT, BACK ONTO THE LEGO! AND MAY IT BE A LITTLE SQUARE FOUR PEG LEGO, ALL ALONE IN THE MIDDLE OF THE FLOOR! MAY IT ALWAYS SOMEHOW BE CORNER UP! AND MAY THEY CONTINUE TO TROD UPON IT! MAY THEY ALSO PEE THEMSELVES A LITTLE! AND THEIR SPOUSE SNICKER NOT-SO QUIETLY!
I couldn't help but reply to this comment with this...

 
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