The Darwin Awards 2007

  • Thread starter Chisel Tooth
  • Start date
  • Replies 0
  • Views 1K

Chisel Tooth

Well it's that time of year again. When I pick my favorite Darwin award winner. There are some pretty good ones this year A continuing testament why stupid people shouldn't breed. Here are two I felt needed mentioning.

(27 July 2007, Guadalajara, Mexico) 24-year-old Jessica was working out in the Provincia Hotel's gym when she realised she needed something from the floor below. Instead of picking up the phone, using the intercom, or just walking downstairs, she decided that the open shaft of the industrial lift was the communications device for her.
So Jessica stuck her head into the empty shaft to shout to the people downstairs. And somehow, she missed noticing that the elevator was coming up towards her. If the elevator had been going down, one could say that she was in no position to observe the approaching lift. But, leaving aside the stupidity of sticking your head into an elevator shaft, if she was looking down, how could she miss the mass of metal inexorably headed her way?

Since an elevator cage and a skull are both solid objects, one had to give. Let's just say, the elevator won. Jessica will be missed by her family, but not by the gene pool.

Original Submission

(14 January 2007, Augusta, West Virginia) Raising a new barn is an endeavor that brings a community together in a working celebration. Demolishing a barn, on the other hand, is a more solitary pursuit. A trio of friends set out to dismantle a dilapidated structure one bracing winter afternoon. Speaking of bracing...
There was wood to be cut, so it seemed sensible for one industrious friend to fire up his chainsaw. It was less sensible for him to set about severing crucial support posts. Carrying the weight of a full barn roof, those wooden beams were all that stood between the demolition workers and structural collapse.

With minimal forethought, this ill-fated lumberjack could have anticipated his soon-to-be deadly problem. It was all fun and games until the roof succumbed to the pull of gravity. As a consolation prize, the deceased was indeed successful at demolishing the barn.

See Ya