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Junk Culture

Old Monkey

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We just got back from an 8 year old neighbor's birthday party. I will sound like a jerk saying this but the party was not our scene, the food was take out chicken and tubs of Walmart potato and pasta salads. The presents were mostly all from Wally World too. Just about every present had Hannah Montana on it and had something to with make-up and dress up. There were a couple of Bratz toys too. We got the girl a coloring book and and a spirograph. Haley was very attentive during the unwrapping period and I am certain she want all that junk too, its hard not to at her age. The problem I have is that it is all CRAP, corporate, unimaginative CRAP. Fortunately Haley has no idea who Hannah Montana is at this point. Its so hard to keep our junky consumer culture from indoctrinating your kids these days. I want my kid to play with toys that don't have movie and television tie ins, back stories or extensive lines of merchandise. I want her to be creative and figure out how to entertain herself when she is bored instead of turning on the idiot box and deadening her brain. The problem is the rest of the parents are busy trying to buy their kids a rich and fulfilling childhood at Walmart and Toys'R'Us. I can't keep my kind insulated from that crap and she is going to think that we are mean and unfair.
 
J

Jonseredbred

Guest
I feel the same way to a point. I dont let the boys get wrapped up in TV, video games, ect. but how do you find the balance between that stuff and alienating them from friends and what makes them click???
 

Thor's Hammer

Wolfish. Sometimes Bites.
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Darin, for what its worth, I know exactly how you feel.
My Kids have no idea about that stuff. No McD's, and definately no wally world, Hanna montana, disney channel, bratz, or any other corporate garbage.
My cousins two daughters live on that stuff, makes me really sad to see them aspiring to be Hannah montanna.

Great thread title BTW...
 

sawinredneck

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Sorry Darin, while I respect youre ideals, I see many failures ahead of you.
Unless you want to join a cult, and uproot youre family entirely from society, you cannot, and will not, be able to shelter her from this.
I am guilty as well, it's easy for me to plop the boy in front of the idiot box for few minuets of quite! He sees all the CRAP you speak of and says "I want that, I want that!" Already, at 3 1/2!!! We have become a bunch of materialistic PIGS!!!
I used to laugh a people like you, "Just wait till that girl hits college, man is she going to be out of control!" "I don't care how you live, the real world will catch up someday!"
Some ways I am still right, but I hope I am mostly wrong. I hope that the lifestyle you have chosen instills her with better morals than most of our society has. And I hope she can fall back on things you have taught her, and will make better choices than most of us have.
I have great respect for what you are trying, but I am afraid there are not enough people left with morals of their own to be able to teach ANY morals to the children of today.
Sorry.
 

squisher

THE CALM ONE!!!!
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I'm just doing the best I can, what else do you do? Can't keep your kids alienated you just have to educate them the best you can. When it all comes down to it they're individuals and will eventually choose their own path. As parents we just need to supply them with some tools to help them make their own decisions.

I do hear exactly what you're saying though Darin.

Having no television is a big plus for us, and I will never have video games in my house. At your friends whatever, but I'm not down with the video games.
 

sotc

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i give my kid sticks and stones:) i try to stay away from that kind of stuff for the most part also. not that its bad but it gets to be to much imo
 
F

Frans

Guest
Sorry Darin, while I respect youre ideals, I see many failures ahead of you.
Wow, what a statement. One which I disagree with.
Darin, while I have not met your child personally, but just from reading what you post, and my personal experience from meeting you, it seems to me that you are a conscientious parent who has dedicated himself to doing a good job raising a child.
Already that has proven to be true just from who Haley is today.

Good job!

Unless you want to join a cult, and uproot youre family entirely from society, you cannot, and will not, be able to shelter her from this.
You can, and many parents do, shelter their kids from believing that poorly manufactured cheap stuff is the best. Sure, all kids, and adults too for that matter, buy into crap which is stuffed down their throats in the form of adverts and peer pressure, but....

When you raise your children with a strong sense of individuality, a clear sense of right and wrong, and the ability to recognize value when they see it, that child is no longer willing to accept as o.k., alot of the crap which advertisers want us to incorporate into our lives.


I feel kind of sorry for you sawintheredneck, because with your outlook, then you might as well throw in the towel, and set your kids up for a life working at macdonalds, being overweight, buying from the dollar store, and thinking it is just fine.
 

sawinredneck

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Interesting, I didn't think I was being disrespectful to wards Darin. I just call them as I see them.

As for feeling sorry for me, I don't think that is necessary. Everyone that has met him comments on how well his manners are.
He tels me he can't do something, I tell him he is not trying hard enough, and wait and work with him so he can learn to do it himself.
I am not a slacker, I do what I have to to get the job done, no matter how inventive I have had to be. I try to instill the same traits in him.
 

Old Monkey

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  • Thread Starter Thread Starter
  • #11
Darin, for what its worth, I know exactly how you feel.
My Kids have no idea about that stuff. No McD's, and definately no wally world, Hanna montana, disney channel, bratz, or any other corporate garbage.
My cousins two daughters live on that stuff, makes me really sad to see them aspiring to be Hannah montanna.

Great thread title BTW...
Living out in the countryside must make it a lot easier. Sometimes I wish we lived further afield.

Frans, I understand what Andy was getting at.

Butch, I try to take my kid floating down the river, canoeing, skiing, hiking and camping as much as possible. I don't think it is too horrible a childhood.
 

sawinredneck

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I only wish most parents would do half of what you do for that girl Darin! Even a quarter!!

Standing next to a four year old, and her mother, girl, "Mommy, I want to go to Sally's house."
Mother "Shut up you spoiled F'n brat!"
I wish I was making it up.
 

stehansen

Climbing Up
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All you can do is your best Darin. My kids thought I was unfair at times. What helped a lot was that my oldest for some reason wasn't into all that stuff and neither were her friends. So that helped with her younger siblings who wanted more fad type stuff. My oldest just thought that stuff (at the time it was Pokémon cards) was a waste of money and just dumb. Which it is. Just keep having those conversations with her about you and your wife's beliefs about consumerism and I"ll bet that you will do OK. My nephew that is in the Josh Turner band did every stupid fad that came along when he was a kid and my sister thought it was cool. He was the karate kid for a while, then he was MC Hammer/break dancing guy for a while, then he was guitar player/country music guy and that stuck. He turned out fine so, I don't know. Another thing, society puts pressure on young girls to start putting on make-up at a ridiculously young age. This is retarded. I'm not talking about playing dress-up I'm talking about everyday. It was a long fight for me to convince my daughters that they were beautiful, smart, and talented young ladies and were not going to have to resort to using make up and/or dressing provocatively in order to attract the attention of boys. Their problem was going to be how to sort out the young men who cared for and respected them from the ones that just wanted to use their bodies for an amusement park. Good luck to all you Dads with young children.
 
B

Blinky

Guest
I'm with you Darin. I don't even have cable or network TV. When we watch something, we all watch a DVD from the video store together.
My daughter just turned 11 and she can walk outside with a box of driveway chalk and entertain herself for hours. We have a new piece of art on the driveway for everybody to see every time it rains... it's pretty cool.
She takes art classes and diving practice after school 2 or 3 days a week. And just as a proud Dad side note, she just finished the season winning all 5 club meets she entered, walked away with the Triangle Region Diving Championship and placed 6th in the AAU/JO East Coast Regionals.

It can be done. She still likes Hannah Montana and Disney and stuff, she gets all that from her Mom's and school friends... she still wants me to buy her all that cheap crap... but I just don't. I hate telling her no, but I've learned to do it. I'm convinced that most valuable thing you can give a kid is your time.
 

treesandsurf

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Nov 30, 2006
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Hawaii
It seems that the cheap culture stuff you are talking about Darin is a sign of our unawareness or unconsciousness. Sedatives come in so many different forms.

To raise a kid to be a conscientious, aware human being is becoming exceptionally rare, unfortunately. Personally, I don't see all that stuff as bad inherently but if you get caught up in it you miss all this beautiful world going on all around us...

Good for you for hoping for a more aware consciousness for your kid, I'm sure she'll pick up a lot just from being around people that don't waste all their time buying into the distractions.

jp:D
 

No_Bivy

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take a kid fishing, or climbing. or blueberry picking.........anything but hanna montana. We only get two channels, so not much tv here
 
F

Frans

Guest
To raise a kid to be a conscientious, aware human being is becoming exceptionally rare, unfortunately. jp:D
It is also rare to maintain a healthy happy marriage these days. Don't like your spouse today? Just get divorced, and kids be dammed.
 

Paul B

I dig hammocks.
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I think a happy medium is a decent way to go.

My parents said no to me when I grew up, I dealt with it.

I remember being about 11 or 12 and asking my dad for a new bike, he said he was done buying me bikes, if I wanted a new bike so bad I should go get a paper route and buy my own.

So I got a paper route. Then a new mountain bike a few months later. I have been gainfully employed at something ever since. No hard feelings, thanks for the life lesson pops. :)
 

Che

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I think a happy medium is a decent way to go.

My parents said no to me when I grew up, I dealt with it.

I remember being about 11 or 12 and asking my dad for a new bike, he said he was done buying me bikes, if I wanted a new bike so bad I should go get a paper route and buy my own.

So I got a paper route. Then a new mountain bike a few months later. I have been gainfully employed at something ever since. No hard feelings, thanks for the life lesson pops. :)
Funny how smart our folks were after all. :|: My mom keeps apologizing to me still though, about making me do so much 'work' and taking care of my younger sisters. I don't remember it like she does at all, I think it shaped my work ethic....thanks for the life lesson mom.:)

I kept most of the crap at bay while my kids were young, BUT.....after they were teenagers, I allowed satellite tv and tv-game-crap. It's been a fight since. One good thing though, it gives you something to take away as punishment and lets you feel GOOD doing it!! :/:

Stick to your guns, Darin.....you're doing just fine!

Oh..........my FAVORITE birthday present for young kids is a really good flashlight. None of that 'cute' crap, just a good metal flashlight.
 

Paul B

I dig hammocks.
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Oh..........my FAVORITE birthday present for young kids is a really good flashlight. None of that 'cute' crap, just a good metal flashlight.
funny, I bought my neice and nephew flashlights for christmas last year, that and $10 for their piggy banks. :)

This year my nephew has learned to read so I am on the hunt for a book I had as a kid, it was about 3 inches thick, dictionary sized called 'the big book of amazing facts'. It had one topic per page and I read that thing cover to cover over my breakfast time before school.

I might end up going to the local Chapters store with him and spend some time finding a book he likes, I cant wait till I can share my book collection with jr. I have many books from my early teens and onward. Too bad I sold my Hardy boys and such, I had about 30 of them I think.
 

Bodean

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I am not expert on kids and their raising,

When I was a kid we played with garbage.

Cheap and inventive.

My friends wore flip flops and burlap coffee bags as tunics.
 

Stumper

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Mar 6, 2005
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Colorado
Darin, I just spent a week with a bunch of kids. A couple of them are horribly screwed up and may never recover but most of them were great kids with outstanding parents.....it showed and the kids spoke respectfully about their parents. The exceptional parents/exceptional kids are motivated in their pursuit of better things than pop culture has to offer by Christianity and biblically based morality.....you and Kathy are motivated by your own good sense and an innate sense of morality. You are winding up at the same place. Don't get discouraged-lots of kids can see the difference in wholesome activities and creativity compared to prepackaged junk-esp. when they know their parents truly love them.
 

NickfromWI

King of Splices
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Mar 30, 2005
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Snowless California
A few weeks ago I to my nieces first birthday party. She had literally 50-75 gift from people. Even at 1 year old, I could see it was all crap. I had a scared feeling like, "is this what I have to look forward to?" The room was filled with that.

I was very happy because the gift that Karina and I picked was the one she played with the most...by a long shot. Well. We got her two gifts. Plain wooden blocks with the letters on them. But the one she played with a lot:



...I am on the hunt for a book I had as a kid, it was about 3 inches thick, dictionary sized called 'the big book of amazing facts'.
Paul, I regularly frequent used book stores. I'll keep my eyes out!

love
nick
 
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