The Joke/Funny Pic/Video Thread
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MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
<iframe width="420" height="315" src="//www.youtube.com/embed/USqZsdn_qzM" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
Maximalist
Ок
Until the next "doomsday" 100 days
http://www.itar-tass.com/obschestvo/761575
http://www.itar-tass.com/obschestvo/761575
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
Kinda funny! 
rskybiz
TreeHouser
Saw this today good for a laugh or two!
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rgrr6b6Vt6M&desktop_uri=/watch?v=rgrr6b6Vt6M
http://m.youtube.com/watch?v=rgrr6b6Vt6M&desktop_uri=/watch?v=rgrr6b6Vt6M
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
Haha, love that snowman!
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
The Grower's Night Before Christmas
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the growroom
Not a plant was still standing; not a bud was in bloom.
The branches were drying, hung out in a line
In hopes that a bankroll soon would be all mine
The trimmers were ready to manicure buds;
But meanwhile did nothing but drink up my suds.
Didn’t matter to me; I still had my stash.
And in just a few weeks I’d be swimming in cash.
Then, at the front door, arose such a clatter,
I stubbed out my joint to see what was the matter.
Away down the hallway I flew like a flash,
Looked out the window and let out a gasp.
What to my wondering eyes did appear,
A drug bust in progress with ten cops in SWAT gear!
They came to the door and pounded away.
It was worse than the cops; they were all DEA!
Now I was panicked; I didn’t want blame
I yelled at the trimmers and called them by name:
"Now, Jeremy! Now, Jason! Now Pedro and Dale!
Get out of here, dudes, or you’re going to jail!
To the back porch! To the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away, dash away all!"
They took off like rabbits, hightailing it fast.
I now worried greatly about saving my ass.
The cops were now breaking the door down with force.
The plants gotta go, I thought with remorse.
I ran to the fireplace to burn up my crop,
When suddenly St. Nicholas dropped down with a plop.
“Holy shit! It’s Santa!” I said with surprise.
I wondered, could St. Nick tell the cops a few lies?
Police were now swarming through the front door
And screaming at me to “Lie down on the floor!”
But Santa winked slyly and settled my head,
And soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
He spoke not a word, and made not a sound
Just filled up his toy sacks with all of my pounds.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;
He sprang to his sleigh, taking all of my crop.
Regardless, I’m happy I didn’t get popped.
The cops were all pissed; the evidence was gone.
They couldn’t even bust me for having a bong!
I laughed to myself as they drove out of sight --
“That’s the best present ever on this Christmas night!”
'Twas the night before Christmas, and all through the growroom
Not a plant was still standing; not a bud was in bloom.
The branches were drying, hung out in a line
In hopes that a bankroll soon would be all mine
The trimmers were ready to manicure buds;
But meanwhile did nothing but drink up my suds.
Didn’t matter to me; I still had my stash.
And in just a few weeks I’d be swimming in cash.
Then, at the front door, arose such a clatter,
I stubbed out my joint to see what was the matter.
Away down the hallway I flew like a flash,
Looked out the window and let out a gasp.
What to my wondering eyes did appear,
A drug bust in progress with ten cops in SWAT gear!
They came to the door and pounded away.
It was worse than the cops; they were all DEA!
Now I was panicked; I didn’t want blame
I yelled at the trimmers and called them by name:
"Now, Jeremy! Now, Jason! Now Pedro and Dale!
Get out of here, dudes, or you’re going to jail!
To the back porch! To the top of the wall!
Now dash away! Dash away, dash away all!"
They took off like rabbits, hightailing it fast.
I now worried greatly about saving my ass.
The cops were now breaking the door down with force.
The plants gotta go, I thought with remorse.
I ran to the fireplace to burn up my crop,
When suddenly St. Nicholas dropped down with a plop.
“Holy shit! It’s Santa!” I said with surprise.
I wondered, could St. Nick tell the cops a few lies?
Police were now swarming through the front door
And screaming at me to “Lie down on the floor!”
But Santa winked slyly and settled my head,
And soon gave me to know I had nothing to dread;
He spoke not a word, and made not a sound
Just filled up his toy sacks with all of my pounds.
And laying his finger aside of his nose,
And giving a nod, up the chimney he rose;
He sprang to his sleigh, taking all of my crop.
Regardless, I’m happy I didn’t get popped.
The cops were all pissed; the evidence was gone.
They couldn’t even bust me for having a bong!
I laughed to myself as they drove out of sight --
“That’s the best present ever on this Christmas night!”
CurSedVoyce
California Hillbilly
The Seduction
A wife, with a very seductive voice, asked her husband
"Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No" said her husband.
She gave him a sexy little smile unbuttoned top three
buttons of her blouse and slowly reached down in her
cleavage created by a soft, silky pushup bra and pulled
out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and
smiled approvingly.
She then asked "Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all
crumpled up?" "No I haven't" he said, an anxious tone
in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile pulled up her
skirt, seductively reached into her tight sheer panties
and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill and started
breathing a little quicker with anticipation.
"Now" she said "Have you ever seen 50,000 Dollars
all crumpled up?"
"No way" he said becoming even more aroused and
excited to which she replied:
"Go look in the garage."
A wife, with a very seductive voice, asked her husband
"Have you ever seen Twenty Dollars all crumpled up?"
"No" said her husband.
She gave him a sexy little smile unbuttoned top three
buttons of her blouse and slowly reached down in her
cleavage created by a soft, silky pushup bra and pulled
out a crumpled Twenty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Twenty Dollar bill from her and
smiled approvingly.
She then asked "Have you ever seen Fifty Dollars all
crumpled up?" "No I haven't" he said, an anxious tone
in his voice.
She gave him another sexy little smile pulled up her
skirt, seductively reached into her tight sheer panties
and pulled out a crumpled Fifty Dollar bill.
He took the crumpled Fifty Dollar bill and started
breathing a little quicker with anticipation.
"Now" she said "Have you ever seen 50,000 Dollars
all crumpled up?"
"No way" he said becoming even more aroused and
excited to which she replied:
"Go look in the garage."
rangerdanger
TreeHouser
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
I don't get it.
CurSedVoyce
California Hillbilly
Or his car....
bstewert
TreeHouser
Good one!
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
This is pretty funny!!!
http://dailycurrant.com/2014/01/02/...-37-in-colorado-on-first-day-of-legalization/
http://dailycurrant.com/2014/01/02/...-37-in-colorado-on-first-day-of-legalization/
bstewert
TreeHouser
That has to be made up.
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
But of course!
bstewert
TreeHouser
At first I thought it was true, cuz it was on the Internets.
SouthSoundTree
Treehouser
Crime
Marijuana Overdoses Kill 37 in Colorado On First Day of Legalization
January 2nd, 2014
893242-drugs-overdoseColorado is reconsidering its decision to legalize recreational pot following the deaths of dozens due to marijuana overdoses.
According to a report in the Rocky Mountain News, 37 people were killed across the state on January 1st, the first day the drug became legal for all adults to purchase. Several more are clinging onto life in local emergency rooms and are not expected to survive.
"It's complete chaos here," says Dr. Jack Shepard, chief of surgery at St. Luke's Medical Center in Denver, "I've put five college students in body bags since breakfast and more are arriving every minute.
"We are seeing cardiac arrests, hypospadias, acquired trimethylaminuria and multiple organ failures. By next week the death toll could go as high as 200, maybe 300. Someone needs to step in and stop this madness. My god, why did we legalize marijuana? What were we thinking?"
Rainin' Fire in the Sky
Colorado and Washington state approved the sale of marijuana for recreational use in November though statewide ballot measures. Under the new policies pot is legal for adult use, regulated like alcohol and heavily taxed.
One of the principal arguments of legalization advocates was that cannabis has long been considered safer than alcohol and tobacco and was not thought not to cause overdose. But a brave minority tried to warn Coloradans of the drug's dangers.
"We told everyone this would happen," says Peter Swindon, President and CEO of local brewer MolsonCoors, "Marijuana is a deadly hardcore drug that causes addiction and destroys lives.
"When was the last time you heard of someone overdosing on beer? All these pro-marijuana groups should be ashamed of themselves. The victims' blood is on their hands."
Marijuana Overdoses Kill 37 in Colorado On First Day of Legalization
January 2nd, 2014
893242-drugs-overdoseColorado is reconsidering its decision to legalize recreational pot following the deaths of dozens due to marijuana overdoses.
According to a report in the Rocky Mountain News, 37 people were killed across the state on January 1st, the first day the drug became legal for all adults to purchase. Several more are clinging onto life in local emergency rooms and are not expected to survive.
"It's complete chaos here," says Dr. Jack Shepard, chief of surgery at St. Luke's Medical Center in Denver, "I've put five college students in body bags since breakfast and more are arriving every minute.
"We are seeing cardiac arrests, hypospadias, acquired trimethylaminuria and multiple organ failures. By next week the death toll could go as high as 200, maybe 300. Someone needs to step in and stop this madness. My god, why did we legalize marijuana? What were we thinking?"
Rainin' Fire in the Sky
Colorado and Washington state approved the sale of marijuana for recreational use in November though statewide ballot measures. Under the new policies pot is legal for adult use, regulated like alcohol and heavily taxed.
One of the principal arguments of legalization advocates was that cannabis has long been considered safer than alcohol and tobacco and was not thought not to cause overdose. But a brave minority tried to warn Coloradans of the drug's dangers.
"We told everyone this would happen," says Peter Swindon, President and CEO of local brewer MolsonCoors, "Marijuana is a deadly hardcore drug that causes addiction and destroys lives.
"When was the last time you heard of someone overdosing on beer? All these pro-marijuana groups should be ashamed of themselves. The victims' blood is on their hands."
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
Did you see post 2142?
Ha.
Ha.
JoshINtrees
TreeHouser
Colorado never looked so good. 
MasterBlaster
Administrator Emeritus
Damn straight.
woodworkingboy
TreeHouser
Patience, MB. Louisiana is not a very rich state, they could be looking at the tax revenues generated by legalizing pot, and thinking hmmm..
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