The Joke/Funny Pic/Video Thread

lxskllr said:

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That’s belongs in the random facts thread and not in the funny joke thread.

CurSedVoyce said:

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We were driving home from our kids school spring concert and my wife gave me a heart attack saying I was turning into a one way street with vehicles coming. She didn’t see the street on an angle I was going for. Boy, the adrenaline rush was something.

Had a white knuckler once that would pound the dash if a car came out of a driveway orside street 100 plus yards out.
Rather unnerving. So loud it sounded like you indeed hit something as she shouted "look out".

My mom used to always perform the classic "soccer mom arm reach" whenever she would have to hit the breaks quickly and abruptly. A lot of you know the move I'm referring to; where your mother, or someone else, shoots their arm across the center console, straight out, and across your chest, in an instinctive effort to somehow keep you from flying forward and hitting something, or hurting yourself somehow.

While it is possible to determine that someone genuinely cares about you by how often they perform a "soccer mom arm reach," the maneuver itself is utterly pointless when performed on adults, but it may have some effect on a small child. But small children typically shouldn't be sitting in the front passenger seat.

Additionally, seatbelts in modern vehicles, which are designed to lock anytime the passenger(s) or driver are suddenly propelled forward, work reliably and flawlessly. Sadly, this means that, unless the car being driven is very old, these modern seat belts have rendered the "soccer mom arm reach" obsolete.

However, it still remains a strong indicator of whether or not someone cares about/loves you, or at least strongly values your safety...or that they're a soccer mom lol

Sarah tends to gesticulate wildly and in one's face while she's riding. And driving, for that matter. She likes to explain things with her hands, six inches from your nose...