Search results for query: *

  1. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    You selfish bastard!
  2. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    I wonder how long it takes for a giraffe to throw up.
  3. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    I got nuthin on this guy….
  4. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    To dogs in the US, the 4th of July is probably like an annual trauma festival.
  5. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Interesting how fast a person can go from “ too drunk to cook a frozen pizza” to “ sober enough to fight a fire”.
  6. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    People sentenced to house arrest last year kinda lucked out, eh?
  7. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    I haven’t sold the Chinese anything, I just buy a ton of stuff from them.
  8. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    CPR is like the human version of blowing in a video game cartridge and hoping it works again.
  9. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    NSFW doesn’t exist if you work in the porn industry.
  10. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    “ Not Safe For Work” is less syllables than “ NSFW”
  11. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    At some point, Subway convinced us that it’s healthy to eat almost a loaf of bread in one sitting.
  12. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Ever since 1773, the Atlantic Ocean has been a bunch of salty weak tea. :|:
  13. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Betty White starred in a TV show about being an old lady 35 years ago.
  14. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Triscuts are pretty good if you’ve ever wondered what the wicker furniture tastes like but it cost too much to eat.
  15. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Ahh yea. The ultimate answer to the universe, life, and everything. I love that book.
  16. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    What sounds more believable, a horse with a horn or a leopard-moose-camel with a 10 foot neck?
  17. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Is anyone surprised that the target market group for fidget spinners lost interest really quickly?
  18. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Egg salad is still chicken salad.
  19. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    Treehouses are the ultimate insult to trees. “ I killed your friend, here hold him for a while.”
  20. Jonny

    Random intoxicated thoughts... possibly nsw

    If you were born feet first, that means you briefly wore your mom like a hat.
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