Funny stories from tree workers.

[Chris E]

This one is non tree work related but still funny imo

I was working at a plumbing supply type outlet/warehouse. So one of the other guys working there was bit on the chubby side and was talking to a delivery driver and sorting out the paper work and the delivery driver was trying to read the name tag on his shirt to put on his paper work and then he says " Sorry mate, I wasn't looking at your tits I was just trying to read your name tag"

 

[Mesquite]

I guess nothing funny has happends since 2016

 

[Bermy]

I'll bite:
I was pruning a large blackwood and it was over a common laneway. This fella walked back and forth three times during the job looking concerned, despite the cones and ute mostly blocking the lane (to keep people from walking back and forth)
Finally he asked my groundie if we were cutting it down (been there three hrs already) and she said 'yes, one branch at a time. Before his eyes popped totally out of his head and then exploded, she she fessed up, no it's just getting pruned. He didn't come back.

 

[Ed L]

100' boom truck, free swinging basket cutting dead limbs from 120' Cottonwoods.
Drunk ass neighbor....."arborist" (he ground stumps) telling me I was doing everything wrong. Stayed far enough away Al couldn't hit him with the branches I cut.
Had enough...motioned for Ron to kill the truck. Loudly announced to be brought down and Lou could come up and finish.
Lou ran back to his house so fast he left a dust cloud....idiot.

Ed

 

[JustJake]

What have you got?

No shit, there I was, up to my knees in saw dust and mix fuel oil caps...

I had just walked from the job tree in the backyard and up to the trucks to grab a throw line and a big shot. As I walked back with the big shot the neighbor lady(sweet old lady) asked what the big slingshot was for.

I told her I was a professional tree climber and as such sometimes people call me to rescue cats from trees. That being said we manually climb the trees to get the cats down. Sometimes if the home owner won't pay for services rendered we have to come out and replace the cats in the tree, which is what the sling shot is for.

She called the cops.

Every time me or my boss gets up in a tree and a nervous customer comes out we always mention that the climber may or may not have first day jitters. But they've watched a couple YouTube videos and "should" be just fine.

 

[Tree09]

Lol i love saying that to engineers, especially when you're about to do something cool.

 

[Treeaddict]

I was descending fairly quickly out of a large poplar and a near vertical 1” stub of a very close maple tried to enter the exit only area of my body. I don’t know if I ever straightened up so fast in my life. Luckily it didn’t make it through the seat of my pants.

 

[lxskllr]

That'll get your attention!

 

[Treeaddict]

Sure nuff! Just glad it wasn’t jagged and splintery.

 

[SkwerI]

Stubs kill!

 

[flushcut]

“No stubs”

 

[Treeaddict]

“No stubs”

Quoting Butch?!

 

[flushcut]

Yes indeed.

 

[biggun]

I was descending fairly quickly out of a large poplar and a near vertical 1” stub of a very close maple tried to enter the exit only area of my body. I don’t know if I ever straightened up so fast in my life. Luckily it didn’t make it through the seat of my pants.

I was once pruning a large Ash tree in the UK. There were quite a few Blackthorn and Hawthorn growing in the understory. Both pretty spikey. In fact painfully spikey, as I was about to find out.

I had finished the prune and got to the lowest bow, kicked off and tried to descend as fast as possible to clear the spikey trees. I hit a bit of pitch on my line and the device stopped rather quickly. I swung into the trees and got tagged by a thorn right under my left butt cheek and top of my hamstring.

It was Valentines day and my missus spend the evening trying to dig this huge thorn outta my ass whilst I was bent double.

Some say I know how to show a girl a good time on Valentines, i don't think she saw it that way.

 

[Tommy_B]

Could have popped to Hamstead Heath and made some money out of it mate!!